Last Thursday morning as I was walking very slowly and sweeping our wet concrete basketball court with a push broom, I suffered a freak accident that shattered my kneecap in two. I still am puzzled by how I fell. I was walking very slowly as I made the turn with my push broom. If anything, the broom helped me be more stable on my feet. It was as if a lightening bolt struck me. I was on the ground before I even knew what hit me. I actually looked around from the pavement to see if I had been attacked because the fall seemed unnatural and as I was lying there, it seemed like I had been pushed in the shoulders. It’s a really bizarre accident.
Yesterday while sitting on the porch all day, a kind friend came to visit me. Together, we wondered aloud what would have happened if instead of my kneecap I would have hit my head with that kind of violence. Given the force, time and location of the fall, I doubt I would still be alive today. Therefore I am very grateful for this relatively minor injury.
One thing that is clear to me is that troubles like this are often a blessing in disguise. Suffering can be medicinal. When confronted with these trials, I must ask the question, “How can this suffering help form me into the person God wants me to be?” As I lie around immobilized today, I have been thinking about 4 ways in which this broken bone might be medicine for my soul or for the soul of others:
1) Maybe I’m not humble enough. It’s humbling not to be able to move about freely and care for yourself. Humbling to have to depend on others so much. Humbling to appear disheveled and feeble and wretched in front of them. Humility is perhaps the greatest of all virtues. Whatever moves me more towards more authentic humility is good for my soul. So my job is to remain joyful and accept whatever God has given me.
2) Maybe I’m not grateful enough. A broken knee cap can make you grateful for all the things that you might normally take for granted. Things like your wife, your children, the ability to walk, the ability to move about without pain, etc. Gratitude is probably the most beautiful virtue. It seems that perhaps I am being called to be more grateful and to express that gratitude better to God and others.
3) Maybe I’m not praying enough, not being attentive enough to the most important things in life. This injury has slowed my life down to a crawl. I have more time to notice beauty and praise God for it. More time to sit and drink coffee with Him. More time to talk and listen to Him quietly. More time to intentionally sanctify my thoughts, words, and actions. If breaking a knee cap is necessary to get me to do grow more intimate in my relationship with God, then how can I view it as anything other than a blessing?
4) Maybe other people need to grow in compassion. My situation has certainly elicited kind compassion from many people. Maybe they need this to become the beautiful people God calls them to be. Maybe my suffering helps them along in this way. Witnessing their compassion is very touching. My family is being so attentive and tender towards me. Friends and family in the community are reaching out just to be nice. Without my troubles, they wouldn’t have the opportunity to do these things. Their good spiritual muscles would not be getting as much exercise. So maybe it’s good for them.
“Let us understand that God is a physician, and that suffering is a medicine for salvation, not a punishment for damnation.” —St. Augustine
Thoughts from the Side of the House... 
July 6, 2019 at 1:07 pm
Hello Sarah,
Thank you very much for taking the time to read my post and thoughtfully respond. I am familiar with the reality of good and evil spirits so I appreciate your thoughts on this matter. There is also a real possibility that an angel of the Lord knocked me down for my own good. This affliction has brought me many blessings so angel or demon or just some inexplicable freak accident – any of these are plausible. In any of these cases, I remain grateful for this affliction because it has been so fruitful for me as a person. I find it comforting that I was wearing my Our Lady of Fatima t-shirt when the accident occurred.
I am very happy to hear that some of the thoughts I posted about fasting have been helpful to you. I am preparing one last post, and then the editor of Franciscan University’s Catechetical Review is going to craft them into a series leading up to Lent 2020. I hope you continue to grow in your fasting. In my mind, it is one of the most important and necessary ingredients to living a Christian life. I base this opinion on all the scriptures about fasting and on the longstanding tradition of the Church.
God be with you, Sarah. Thanks again.
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July 6, 2019 at 9:42 am
Hi Robert. (I know you said people don’t call you that but you also said that you like the name.)
I’m sorry I’m coming to this post rather belatedly; I don’t blog much these days so I miss a lot of my favourite bloggers’ news. I hope your knee is healing nicely. I’m curious that you and the other people who have commented haven’t pointed out the obvious question regarding your accident so I feel obliged to do so: “did you fall or were you pushed?”. I’m sure that with your background you’ve heard of demonic obsession (for others reading this, obsession is like possession but the influence comes from outside rather than inside). I’m no expert on these things but from what you said about feeling like you were pushed in the back I would suggest you need to talk to a priest who is well-versed in demonic problems. At the very least, I would suggest saying the prayer to St. Michael more often, and more prayers to your Guardian Angel and to our Blessed Mother for protection. You could also consider saying the prayers of the organisation called Auxilium Christianorum (I won’t put the link here in case WordPress thinks this message is spam – just Googling for that name should bring up the relevant page without problem). There are also binding prayers that lay people can use but, as I’m sure you know, these should be used with caution. It’s very important for lay people never to address demons directly. Father Z has more information on this. I hope I haven’t alarmed you – God only allows the demons to interfere with us for our sanctification and/or that of those around us. He won’t let them mess with you beyond your ability to cope. At least that’s my understanding. As I said, I’m no expert.
By the way, while I’m here I have to thank you very much for your earlier posts on fasting (I haven’t read the latest ones yet). I was always under the impression that I wouldn’t be able to fast because I seemed to need to graze. I could manage the modern version of fasting – one full meal and two smaller ones not adding up to the full one – but was quite scared of the idea of going without food entirely. Anyhow, your posts gave me courage to try fasting properly and I was very surprised to find that I could leave out breakfast and lunch without too much difficulty. I’m going to try to go for longer next time Lent comes around, or maybe Advent. So thank you for sharing your experiences, and keep up the good work. I’ve prayed for you, and will continue to do so, as and when I remember.
Your sister in Christ,
Sarah Cassidy
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May 31, 2019 at 2:07 pm
Robert, that is NOT the face I would be making right after busting my knee cap. I’m praying for you.
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May 29, 2019 at 12:37 am
As always, Bob, your wisdom and insight are a blessing. I am very sorry you’re going through this. I’ll call Margie and see if I can bring a meal. God bless you.
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May 28, 2019 at 12:12 am
Think you’d heal more slowly if you had an actual photo of the Dude from Hippo?
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May 27, 2019 at 8:49 am
What a wonderful reflection….although I think that you are a great example of humility, Bob.
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May 27, 2019 at 8:35 am
Prayers for your healing (healing is your reoccurring life’s theme)
I say this as I herniated a disc in my back two days ago caring for our granddaughter— I get frustrated lying on the floor— gravitating between ice and heat, waiting until the orthopedic’s office can get me in—- not only am I in pain but my frustration level skyrockets as I can no longer do what I seem to think I need to do— yes, there are many lessons found in such injuries— I also find God’s humor and timing light years from what I think I need— yet He does indeed know best— lessons being learned for certain
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May 27, 2019 at 6:26 am
This is exactly what I needed to read today. I do believe that God uses all things for our good. Thank you so much for sharing. Praying for your recovery!
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